Nobody, including me, likes to follow “dumb” rules. Unfortunately, Maryland’s legal code is chock-full of some pretty bizarre laws and regulations. In my spare time, I read Maryland’s legal codes — mostly so I can clean up in pub trivia, but also because it might some day help me at my job. And I have come across some of the weirdest laws Maryland has to offer.
Disclaimer: While I don’t ever condone breaking the law, you should know that most of these statutes have not been enforced for decades, if not centuries. If you get charged with one of these crimes, Keep Calm — and Call Drew.
Maryland’s weirdest laws
Here are some of the wackiest statutes Maryland law includes:
- Oral sex is illegal in Maryland — giving and receiving. (Read the full law here; it also includes animals.)
- If you live in Baltimore, it is illegal to take a lion to the movies.
- If you are a woman married to a man, it is illegal to go through your husband’s pockets while he’s sleeping. Your guess is as good as mine as to what he’s hiding in there, but it’s technically illegal for you to find out.
- It is illegal to eat while swimming in the ocean.
- Is against the law for a Maryland man to buy a drink for a female bartender.
- If you pretend to tell the future in Caroline County, you could be stuck with six months in the can or a $100 fine. Tell your fortune-teller friends to try Virginia or D.C.
- Last, but not least (and this one’s not even that old): In 2010 Governor O’Malley signed into law Maryland’s Right-to-Dry act. This allows renters to have clotheslines. Steer clear, judgey landlords and HOAs. There’s nothing you can do about it now!
While these are only a smattering of the weird laws in Maryland, you can read about more of them here.
The question is, should you follow these crazy laws? That decision is up to you. While it’s true that most of these (except the Right-to-Dry Act) are not currently enforced in the state, they are still technically on the books. If you do get caught violating one of these archaic laws, hire an aggressive Annapolis criminal defense attorney.
At Drew Cochran, Attorney at Law, you can work with me on any number of criminal defense issues, whether the laws are outdated or not. I will give it to you straight, and let you know the likelihood that you can win your case. To learn more about the services I provide, call 410-271-1892 or fill out this contact form. If you’re accused of breaking a dumb rule, take a deep breath and remember: Keep Calm – and Call Drew.